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Thursday, September 24, 2009 | 10:00 PM
I've learnt a hard lesson. It hit me off the once-oh-steady ground, and now I'm still finding something firm to hold on to.
I've learnt never to be greedy (not in terms of food, tsk), not to ask for more, and I shall be content with whatever I have now with me, for in case I lose everything I once had.
I kept reminding myself that rule, but I was too lenient with myself, such that I thought I might be some special case, where greed might perhaps allows me to achieve something big.
Now, its a big no-no, and I've just proved myself wrong.

I promise, I swear, I cross my heart,
& I will not make the same mistake again, risking my own future.

So what if this time I passed my GP, it could jolly well be pure luck. It cannot make up for my 'fail' for Chemistry, with a pathetic grade (and I will keep it a secret). That grade, it will embarass me infront of my tutor, again I will be the stupidest student he's ever taught. That grade, will never be good enough for him. Come on, he expects an A okay, damn it. (I've got this urge to scold the F word but still, I need to refrain from it at least in my blog.)
And I dont know what damn reason I can come up with to at least convince him I was really in a very screwed up condition for Chemistry papers.

I'll just prepare myself to be as small as possible during tuition.

Still, this one and a half month, I could make a big difference. And as I told Pew, I wanna become Celebration 3 and 4.

& Soon, I can at least be on par. :)



Thursday, September 17, 2009 | 7:02 PM
I'm done w Prelims. Its probably the worst exam I've had in my life. It was horrendously done. Bad, ultimate. But whatever it is, I'm hecking it now, 'cause I really gonna enjoy myself for at least 1 week before getting back the drive to do the last sprint again.



& Now, I'd rather not talk about that, it only reminds me how I lost 35 marks in Chem P3 and couldn't finish Chem P1. Chemistry is the main killer.



Still, I can't help feeling a sense of liberation.



Friday, September 04, 2009 | 3:21 PM
One and a half year of lectures, tests all come down to the one moment that stretches 2 hours long. While chasing with time, the sound of pens scribbling on the exam script could be heard distinctively. I looked up and tried so hard to push myself on. But I know clearly that this time round, being lucky and hardworking could no longer bring me through this hurdle. I need more than just those -- a little smarter brain, which I obviously don’t have. :(

Those papers were meant not to be finished, especially Biology. Their ulterior motive is to demoralize me so badly, and see how I crumble into rumbles.

Yet, I still have to go on, there's still like more papers to come after the Sept hols. And of course, the Big As to conquer. I could not afford to be weak at this point. But, I don't like being strong either.

Sigh.





CHRISTINA

petite.loud.wols.
Legal for alcoholic drinks :)
1st Nov 1991
Scorpio
Tampines JC. 08S02

"Better now than I was before, but I still miss you"


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This blogskin is made by Eugin and he obtained his resources from Shizoo only.